


the things we choose

by SparrowPixie



Category: The Daevabad Trilogy - S. A. Chakraborty
Genre: Danarhi, F/M, Post EOG, Post Epilogue, Spoilers for Empire of Gold, hey this could happen, i love these two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:47:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26990011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SparrowPixie/pseuds/SparrowPixie
Summary: After reuniting in Cairo eight years after the battle, Dara and Nahri discuss the future and catch up. This could be taken as a bonus chapter to my other fic “I have to go”
Relationships: Darayavahoush e-Afshin/Nahri e-Nahid
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	the things we choose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [astarisms](https://archiveofourown.org/users/astarisms/gifts), [littlethiefs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlethiefs/gifts).



> So this was initially the last chapter of “I have to go” instead of the one through Yaqub’s eyes. Thanks to astarisms for her help!

“And a little went into my eye too,” Nahri grimaced. “Blood was all over my face.”

“This gentleman  _ lived  _ afterwards?” asked Dara.

Nahri nodded helping herself to more of the feast he had conjured for them on the rooftop. “Yes. Head wounds just bleed a lot.”

Dara turned his gaze to the moonlit city below, shaking his head. “I’m hard pressed to imagine this as a profession you enjoy, little thief.”

“You didn’t get to see me after I became more practiced in healing and surgery,” Nahri said primly. Her eyes glinted with something fierce. “I love it. I’m really good at it.”

“So I have heard.”

He knew. He’d followed tales of her practice closely over the years. She had stunned residents of both human and Daeva villages alike with her talent. Daunting surgeries, quick remedies and a bossy bedside manner had become her trademarks among the people. Dara sighed, his eyes combing over her for what must’ve been the thirtieth time since they reunited in the Cairene cemetery from just a few hours past. 

She was so different from the weeping woman he’d said goodbye to almost a decade ago. Gone was the teary eyed girl who he’d parted ways with and in her place was the fiery, confident con artist he remembered. That he’d fallen in love with.

Over the years her face had sharpened, losing its youthful, rounded edges and taking on a more refined, elegant shape. There were a few lines on her forehead which Dara could only attribute to Nahri’s proclivity to wear her every feeling in a dramatic expression on her face. Her eyes were just as sharp and glimmering as his memory recalled. And those lips… 

She was breathtaking. 

“Stop looking at me like that,” she smirked.

Dara felt his cheeks warm and shrugged, caught. “It cannot be helped, Nahri. Perhaps you should’ve taken care to age poorly over the years.”

The smirk on her lips did not waver, instead she helped herself to some more of the wine. “I don’t have to ask what  _ you’ve _ been doing. Zaynab and Aqisa told me much of your adventures together. Then there was a very sudden reconstruction of one of the local Daevastana villages, seemingly completed overnight,” Nahri said, arching a brow at him. “I assume that was you.”

Dara shook his head, expression nonplussed. “Must’ve been someone else. That particular village refused aid from ‘Manizeh’s Scourge,’ Nahri.”

The smile she gave him was enough to send a chill down his spine. Proud. She was proud of him. And to know as much was more that the Afshin could ask. A Nahid he was finally proud to have served was proud of  _ him _ . And he was proud of Nahri - not out of fear of her or of others or for himself, but because of who she was. Of the things she had done. Beautiful things. Strong things. Historical things.  _ Kind  _ things. With nothing more than courage and blind faith in herself.

“Anything else going on for you? Aside from collecting slave vessels?”

The way she flinched saying the words “slave vessels” did not escape Dara’s notice. She had confessed to him her concern that she would not be able to free the poor souls he’d collected. Dara calmly reassured her that she had plenty of time to figure it out. 

“I’ve made friends with some Sahrayn pirates. I visit them occasionally. Whenever I need company.” He took a gulp of his wine, supplementing courage. “And I visit…this city. Often. Usually for a night or so.”

“What for?”

The tone of her voice told Dara she knew the answer. He shot her a look, the familiar warmth rising to his cheeks.

“You know why,” he murmured, the corner of his lip twitching up. Dara exhaled. “But I suppose if you want me to say it, I visit whenever I begin to miss you, Nahri.”

She laughed softly. “ _ Nahri,  _ Nahri, Nahri… It’s been sometime since you’ve addressed me so casually.”

“We’ve not had many casual moments,” Dara replied with a shrug. “And it has been a long time since I have been able to address you at all. Would you prefer me to continue to call you, Banu Nahida?”

Dara saw a blush painted on her cheeks and felt a familiar sense of satisfaction. He grinned to himself, looking at the city below them once more.

“No. Nahri is perfect.” There was a smile in her voice. “Though, I suppose I wouldn’t mind ‘Banu Nahida’ on particular occasions.”

“What sort of occasions?”

She grinned wickedly. “Perhaps the kind we never got to finish in that cave.”

Dara nearly choked on his wine. He was shocked that Nahri still thought of that moment. Shocked and happily surprised. Had she wished as often as he did that they hadn’t been interrupted? Had she laid awake at night imagining what could have been just as he had? 

Then it hit him. 

She had just said that in the future she wouldn’t mind him addressing her as Banu Nahida.  _ In the future _ . On “ _ particular occasions _ ,” meaning they would presumably be near one another… frequently. Constantly? No, he shouldn’t get his hopes up. Not unless he asked.

Dara blinked and tried to keep his voice even. “As you wish, Nahri.” He paused, summoning the courage to continue. “Forgive me, but may I ask… where do we go from here? Or, rather, where do  _ I  _ go from here?”

He forced himself to look at her. She was chewing thoughtfully on a stuffed pepper. His heart pounded in his ears. 

_ Please stay with me. Please. I will follow you anywhere. _

“You shouldn’t ask me where you should go,” Nahri said matter-of-factly. “This life is yours to lead for once - your choices should be your own - and I-“

And it all came rushing out before Dara could stop himself. “I’ve missed you, Nahri.  _ Terribly.  _ I choose to go with you. I care not where it takes me.”

She froze and for an awful moment, Dara felt his heart sink. He’d said too much. He’d frightened her. Damn his hasty tongue.

“Dara.”

Her voice made him sit up straighter. Her eyes, dark and endlessly deep, bore into him with a level of compassion only  _ she _ had ever shown him. He blinked away the tears threatening to sting his eyes and swallowed his pride, nodding for her to continue.

“Tell me. What did you mean when you said goodbye,” Nahri asked timidly. “What did you mean when you said you wondered how things would be if we’d done things… differently.”

Shame fell over Dara. He shut his eyes tight. He wanted to pretend that he thought about what could’ve been every day. He didn’t want to admit he lived in constant regret, even though he was redeeming himself, imagining what he should’ve done. There was just so much. Too much.

But she had asked.

And almost as often as Dara wished to change the past, he wished he had the chance to tell Nahri about what he “should’ve done.”

“Well, as far as our history goes, because if I were to recall to you all of the things I would’ve done differently over the course of 1400 years we would be here for weeks,” he said with a feeble laugh, “I suppose I’ll begin with the obvious. I would’ve accepted your proposal in the Grand Temple. A beating heart be damned.” He cleared his throat. “That would’ve made every difference. Saying yes to you. Or saying no and standing aside. I would have you marry the emir and, given your permission, perhaps stole a kiss or two from you in the shadows. Ask you to be with me, even if it was only secretly.

“I would have swallowed my pride. I would have listened to myself and done whatever you asked to make you happy. Be that marrying you and damning your lineage or watching you become Muntadhir’s wife, having his children. Living peacefully in the palace. Standing by your side as your Afshin.”

Nahri nodded. He watched as she absorbed everything he’d said. He could see the wheels turning in her mind. There was heavy weight lifted from his chest. All of the words unspoken, their brambles weaved in his heart for nearly two decades now, detached. Even if she rejected him, it would be fine now. Dara had been able to see her again. He’d been able to say everything he’d imagined. 

When he met Nahri’s gaze, she seemed somewhat distraught then curious.

“Dara, what did you always want before? In your first life. How old were you at the end?”

Dara fiddled with the fabric of his trousers. “About thirty.”

When he looked up Nahri’s brows had drawn together, the lines on her forehead creasing deeper.

“That’s young,” she remarked softly. “And what had you wanted to do? What would you have done if you could?”

Dara was slightly startled at the question. No one had ever asked the Scourge what he had wanted to be. Who he had wanted to become. What his own dreams had been instead of what had been dreamt for him. What his thoughts had been before the Nahids had sunk their claws into his brain, their hooks so deep Dara couldn’t escape.

“I had… I did not want much,” he muttered, eyes suddenly distant. “I wanted to be left alone, I suppose. To find someone who I cared for that cared for me back. That…” Dara cleared his throat. “That enjoyed my company, I suppose.”

Nahri nodded, propping her elbow on her knee and resting her chin on her fist, urging him to continue.

“I had watched my cousins find love - either arranged by their parents or if they were lucky, they happened upon it on their own. Chose someone for themselves,” he said wistfully. “But they usually spoke fondly of their wives. They said they missed them often. My cousin, Jahan,” Dara chuckled, shaking his head. “We teased him mercilessly. Whatever expedition we were on, whatever training we were doing, he was always eager to see his wife. Her name was… Reyhan, I believe. I didn’t know her well, but she had very kind eyes. She made him happy.

“He would always threaten if we didn’t stop teasing him, that he would run off with her where we would never find him. It sounded nice to me. To be off in the world with the one you loved.”

When Dara looked back to Nahri, he noticed she was also smiling.

“Did Jahan ever runaway with Reyhan?” 

Dara chuckled. “No, no. Reyhan became pregnant. There was no possibility of my aunts letting them escape then. Not to mention, Jahan had no intention of taking any risks with either of them. He wanted them as close to the Nahids as possible - should anything happen. It was still a nice idea though. It gave me… ideas of my own.”

“Like what?”

“Nothing grand - just things out of my reach personally,” Dara said, voice quiet. “I hoped for a home tucked out of sight. The company of a wife. A child. A family of my own.”

Her hand found his. “That’s it?”

Dara met her concerned gaze and smirked. “That’s a lot for an Afshin general to ask for, Nahri. But if you insist on putting it that way, yes. That’s it. That’s all I wanted.” His expression turned bitter. “I never wanted a shrine. I did not want to be a legend or a folk hero. I did not want tales of supposed glory to be passed onto future generations. I simply wanted… a life. A quiet one, easily forgotten.  _ That _ would have made me happy.”

Nahri nodded, pursing her lips. Her fingers squeezed his harder and Dara suddenly felt anxious. Creator, he had frightened her.

“Dara, I’m… not ready for that kind of life just yet,” she muttered. “I was tethered to Daevabad for so long and I told myself that was fine but then I left and I… I just started to go wherever I wanted and help whoever I wanted when I wanted and I had the ability to  _ finally _ choose for myself.” 

Dara frowned at the sudden glimmer in her eyes. She was close to tears, he could tell. Did Nahri think that she would lose him?

“So eventually that may be what I want but Dara - a quiet life tucked away - but right now, I want adventure. I want to travel and see more of the world. I’m not ready to have my feet on the ground just yet,” she confessed. Nahri shook her head, sniffing. “I can’t take away what you want Dara. If that life, the one tucked away is what you want, I can’t give it to you. Not yet at least. I can’t so easily throw away my freedom to choose. I want to be… a little selfish now and then. Not to mention… I have family in Daevabad. A grandfather. A brother. Friends. I can’t have seen the last of them, Dara.”

Dara squeezed her fingers back, eyes fervent but a smile on his lips. “You asked what I had wanted  _ before _ , little thief. Not what I wanted  _ now, _ ” he said pointedly. “What I would like now, more than anything, is adventures with you. I’ve still got many ifrit to chase and slave vessels to track. My journeys are not yet at a close,” he said with wry smile. “And I would be glad to take you to Daevabad. To wait just outside the veil for you to see your loved ones. To even leave you for a time and return when you are ready. I am prepared, I am willing and I am  _ wanting _ to follow you wherever you go, Nahri.”

There was a pause in which Dara had never imagined his heart was more still. Was she considering his offer? Ready to reject him? His heart pounded. Had she been letting him down easy before? Was this quick visit all she had wanted from him? Some closure?

Nahri scrambled across the small space between them and pressed her lips to his fiercely. It was all the answer he needed. 

When she finally pulled away, her eyes were pink but she looked far from sad.

“No backing out now, Afshin. You’re alive now. There’s no excuse you can make.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,  _ Nahri _ ,” he chuckled, her name a promise on his lips. Still holding her he glanced at the city below again. “And I like this city. Perhaps, someday, I could be tucked away here with you. Or close by.”

“I would like that.”

**Author's Note:**

> Dammit they’re precious


End file.
